Monday, January 12, 2009

James 3

So I've been reading the book of James, following along with my friend Amanda's blog and have been stuck on James 3. Oh how that chapter resonates with me so much, in fact to the point that I lay in bed at night thinking about it.

3:2 "We all make many mistakes, but those who control their tongues can also control themselves in every other way."

Verse 2 hits me with my parenting. It's no secret, I am a yeller, a screamer, at times I probably sound like a raving lunatic! I really don't like that about myself and when I do yell, I feel like I failed immediately afterwards. While I'm yelling, I feel like I'm in charge and if I'm commanding things that I want from my kids (stop fighting! Pick up this mess right now! Go to your room! etc.) at that level of voice they will listen to me. And yes, I could go back to my many visits to the psychologist's office back in my early 20's and say, well it's because I never felt like I had a voice as a child, nobody listened to me, blah blah blah, but that really isn't an excuse. It's a tendency, it's a sort of trigger, but not a good enough reason to react that way as a 33 year old woman and mother. This is an area I would like to see the most growth in my parenting and really feel like I'm on my way there. If you know my husband, you KNOW he doesn't yell, he doesn't spank, he just doesn't believe in that sort of discipline . . . FAR FROM the world I came from for sure! He inspires me at so many levels and that's why I believe without a doubt, God created him just for me.

3:5-6 "So also, the tongues is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do. A tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is full of wickedness that can ruin your whole life. It can turn the entire course of your life into a blazing flame of destruction, fir it is set on fire by hell itself."

Verses 5-6, well that just screams out gossip to me. I LOVE to talk talk talk. I don't intentionally say things to hurt people, I truly don't. But for someone like me, well it's very easy for me to gossip. I never saw anything wrong with it in the past, but now I know it's truly wrong and just don't want to do, don't desire to do it. If there is one thing I've learned from my best friend Erika, it's to hold that tongue. Change the subject. Just don't go there, especially with other women, it's our weakness. It ruins relationships and breaks trust. Since meeting Erika, that is one thing that stands out the most in Chris's eyes, the biggest change or should I say "growth" in me. But I think it will always be a battle. It's one of those things, one of those easy things that we can rationalize that can be so tempting and so destructive for us as women.

There is plenty more in James that I can talk about but those are the big ones for me. It's such a short book but SUCH a GOOD one!! A must for us women to read for sure!

Now I just have to catch up on Matthew. Trying to read the New Testament in 2009 and I'm already behind! Never mind that I'm trying to get started on The Shack too. Oh boy! :o)


Amanda said...

I am so proud of you! You have no idea how much you have inspired me the past two years. And yes, Erika is great at keeping her mouth SHUT! :) My friend Kelly Ann is just like Erika in so many ways and it's funny to hear you describe her because I guess both you and I (loud mouths but cute ones) need best friends who are not so free with their tongue!

Thank you for following along. You are an inspiration and God has used you over and over and over and over again to tear down some walls in my life.

I love you very much and mean it.

Cindy said...

Good for you with all the reading you are doing! I didn't know you were reading The Shack. Brandon is reading it right now too and he was all emotional during whatever chapters he was reading this morning...that never happens! I can't wait for him to finish so I can read it!

Dee said...

i followed you from Amanda's blog --- girl i feel you on the parenting! i too didn't wanna hijack the comments on mama sings, so i blogged my conviction on my blog! that's exactly where James 3 YELLED at me, my parenting!!! i have always said I need God to place things on billboards, because I am so dense...oh He did just that for me!!!!

nice to "meet" another bible study chickie! :)

Dee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.