I can't believe in just a few hours, I will FINALLY get to meet the beautiful baby girl that has spent the past 39 weeks growing inside of me!!! I can't possibly sleep. :o) I have been going over and over the births of my other two miracles, thinking about how much my life has changed since given the opportunity to become a mommy.
A New Day, A New Life, not just for Sofia, but for us all. This morning I was laying in bed at 3am just praying and thanking God for all he has given to me, no matter how unworthy I feel I am to have all the blessings I do, he has blessed me in abundance. My heart is overflowing with joy. My thoughts have been purely wonderful looking back at my life that I've always felt was "not so great", a childhood that was more "forgettable" than "memorable", and seeing it all in a new light. Realizing and being able to pinpoint all of the different times God was there and how he rescued me and comforted me even though I didn't realize He was there. I didn't live a life of faithfullness, in fact I lived a life more in envy of other children, other families, friends, everyone who seemed to have it better than I did, better "luck" than me. Oh how wrong I was.
All the tough times, all the memories I spent my life trying to block out and was successful at doing so for much of it, really made me the woman I am, the wife I've been able to become and the mother of amazing children that God has given me to teach them His ways and to Love and Praise Him, nobody else. I've learned that I cannot "idolize" anyone or "worship" anyone but Him and through God, He will give me the strength to love and be loved like never before by the people he has placed in my life, most importantly my adoring husband and amazing children. I love them in a way I never felt loved and didn't know I was even capable of loving, but realized through His love, I am.
I have spent the early hours today praying to my God for the strength today not just for me, but for my husband and the ones we love. I've prayed for friends who lost a loved one this past week and to help still one of my closest friends' anxious heart and comfort her. I prayed for my children and for my friends that show me so much love and kindness. And then I sat up and prayed, asking the Lord to fill me with the Holy Spirit, to open my heart and mind to accept his Son as my Savior and vowed to live the life that God intended for me to have, walk in His light and live a life showing others how much richer it can be when living it for Him and not just yourself.
Tears of joy spill down my cheeks as I type this, my life is full, my cup is overflowing and I feel blessed, so blessed beyond measure and I get ready to accept one of the greatest gifts God has to offer me, New Life, both spiritually and physically.
Thank You Lord!!!