Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Trying to stay POSITIVE

I really am, I'm really trying to stay positive but it is SO HARD!!! I miss my "normal" life, I miss my energy, I miss my health, I miss my husband, I miss my friends. This "all day sickness" is KILLING ME. I knew it was coming. I have experienced it twice already. I have been blessed with the opportunity to bring another beautiful baby into our lives. I shouldn't be feeling so depressed, but I am. I want to be out in the stores. I want to smell the holiday scents (no way I can smell anything right now). I want to be attending the fun holiday playdates. I want a date night. I want the energy to be running around doing all the fun stuff I normally do during this time of the year. But I can't.

I just make it through the day, counting the hours down until bedtime. I feed the kids, drop/pick up Adrianna from school, take care of baths and teeth and that's about all I have in me. I do have good moments, an hour here and there but that's it. I wake up every morning and lay in bed thinking it's gone, setting my mind that it's done, no more sickness, but then within 30 minutes or so, it's all over. I am having a good hour right now. I'm about to eat lunch and take a nap. I had a good hour last night after dinner but then had a 15 minute vomitting episode that was torture which made that hour seem non existent.

It's week 10 so hopefully this is on it's way passing . . . please be finished by Christmas......

This is just a reminder to me if I EVER think about getting pregnant again. :o) If I write it down, I have something to look back on.

2 comments:

Sabrina said...

Nature has a great way of slowing us down in the first trimester and if anyone I know needed to slow down it was you. I am just sorry you have to be so miserable!
There will be many other Christmas's to come, just focus on yourself that is all you need to do right now. I know you'll be racing around again in early 2009!!
take care and let me know if you need anything!!

Gina said...

You're such a great friend! LOVE YOU!XO